Ive been trying to do anagrams i can,t do it, had to give up, it takes me right back to when first ill, i can t go back there.. some mental work hurts my brain... its not nice..

I only tried for 3 minutes its a feeling of pain and just having to stop thinking
about anything at all, its very frightening, you wonder how long you,ll have to lie there blank minded until you can get back up..
.id forgot how bad it was which is just as well but i can,t try to do anagrams again...

reminds of why i couldn't seek help in the beginning, usually when you have a normal illness you can manage to use your brain to work out how to do things, telephone etc without having the utter exhaustion and pain, only some one who,d had it would understand it..

I really need and needed a third person.. some one i knew and trusted that i could say to..
i want to speak to the doctor will you phone and set the ball rolling explain on my behalf..

an intermediary. a helper not too much to ask surely..