might as well have stopped up.
soon as i sat down in front of computer draughts around me, behind me and left ankle.
itches,
had advice today that ive to look forward and use the energy in a positive way.
picture being well.. a goal. be ruthless..easier said than done..

its always been the same a picture of nice weather me sitting under a tree.
everything else has to be blanked out and at the minute its an impossibility. i,m stuck.
understandable when ive been here such a long time. same groove. same routine.
i,m ok then i,m far from it. like now.
ive realised today that the way forward isnt sitting in this kitchen its out in the world.
i could write a book about anger,
i,m not an angry person as a rule but if you keep it in it turns inward on yourself.
my heads fragile i cant even listen to anyone.. i just say sshh straightaway.

was told too ask my guide cos we all have one.. some times 2.. to help.... show me the way..
and that i want to be well.. healed.